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By Cory Bickmore
MOAB, Utah – Sister Linda Huff, 55, is not usually the sort of ward librarian to rock the boat, but when the new Sunday School President removed every copy of The Princess Bride from the meetinghouse library, she knew she had to act.
She filed a formal complaint with LDS Church headquarters in Salt Lake City.
“I know this falls within his stewardship,” said Huff, “but this is wrong. And it’s not a library. It’s a Material Center.” For decades, The Princess Bride has enjoyed a top spot in the Red Rock Ward’s small library as an oft-used media supplement for Gospel Doctrine classes, elders quorum lessons, and bishopric meetings. “All two DVDs and nine VHS cassettes were checked out every Sunday,” says Huff. “We couldn’t keep them on the shelves.” Enter Boyd Stringly. Called as the ward Sunday School President shortly after moving to Moab, Stringly, 41, was at first fine with all things TPB, but quickly grew concerned. “Every class had turned into a Princess Bride quote session,” he explains. “Sacrament speakers referred constantly to the film. I mean, who can possibly take a talk about honoring marriage seriously when it goes on and on about twu wuv?” So last month when an elderly sister in Gospel Doctrine class commented that King Lamoni had been only “mostly dead,” Stringly knew the time had come. The next thing Huff knew, Stringly appeared at her counter demanding the movies. “There was no stopping him,” she said. “All I could say was, ‘As you wish.’ I wish I had been stronger.” Since then, the Sunday School President has devoted his efforts to reminding members that The Princess Bride is no substitute for the scriptures, however enlightening. Huff disagrees. “That movie is chock full of the gospel. Love, commitment, miracles, swashbuckling—it’s all there. The Church knew what it was doing when it produced it all those years ago.” She explains, “When Westley and Buttercup defeat the Rodents of Unusual Size, that’s truth. That’s personal. We can all relate to that.” At this point in the interview, the tiny librarian becomes emotional. “We each face our own R.O.U.S.’s. We each must wade through the Fire Swamp. And Westley will see us through. I mean that metaphorically, of course.” For his part, Stringly holds no ill will towards Huff. “We all do the best we can. This dear sister fell victim to one of the classic blunders. It doesn’t mean what she thinks it means.” When contacted, the LDS Church Media Services Department stated that the Church had “zero involvement ever” in The Princess Bride, and that the film is “not doctrinal.” The Red Rock Ward bishop could not be reached for comment.
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12 Comments
Lynne Henderson
5/3/2017 11:08:27 am
Crying!! At last, my kind of humour. Fank you. If suv.
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5/3/2017 11:09:10 am
Dearest Lynne,
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John Davis
5/8/2017 11:30:17 pm
Bro 'Stingy': "You guys STOP quoting this film, and I MEAN IT!
Mike Talbot
5/3/2017 07:06:01 pm
My wife and I were laughing hysterically while reading this! That is a ward I can get behind!
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Christian Gibbs
5/7/2017 07:03:36 pm
How do they expect people to teach without The Princess Bride? It would be absolutely, totally, and in all other ways inconceivable!
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Kraig
5/8/2017 10:09:44 pm
I am going to add Fletch to our ward library, it has some awesome quotes, and even mentions the mormon tabernacle choir,and provo!
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5/8/2017 10:14:16 pm
Ha! We had an elder make a "Fletch F. Fletch" nametag when I was an office missionary back in the day. :)
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Kraig
5/10/2017 12:55:07 pm
Haha, fletch has so many quotes I use on a daily basis! Thanks foe the laughs, well written!
Tracy
5/8/2017 10:44:40 pm
This is funny, and I mean it!
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Amy
5/9/2017 08:03:52 pm
Anybody want a peanut? :)))
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Eric
5/10/2017 08:57:03 am
Q: Will TPB ever return to the ward library?
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Jack Heilpern
5/21/2017 08:51:09 am
When did you start this blog, and why have I not seen it before? I'm the stake SS pres here in NC, and made the mistake of reading this on at the start of gospel doctrine this morning. I nearly passed out trying to suppress hilarious laughter and still breath. Wow. Keep up the good work.
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